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My View of Llanview: August 15 Edition

Saturday, August 14, 2010 11:01 PM EDT
Sunday, August 15, 2010 at 12:01 AM ET by Scotty GorePhoto: Errol Lewis/SON(SoapOperaNetwork.com) — "One Life to Live" needs to shake things up a bit. Brenda returns to Port Charles. Kendall returns to Pine Valley. These two heavily promoted events have so overshadowed "OLTL" in recent weeks, it's almost as if the show no longer existed. "OLTL" was so much of an afterthought for ABC that it couldn't even put together any sort of a promo for the same week as those two returns. But, then again, that is more or less a moot point now because, after watching what "One Life to Live" had to offer this past week, they really didn't have anything worth promoting anyway. This show continues on its collision course with cancellation and yet it seems in no rush to try to postpone the inevitable. The Ford brothers continue to be coma-inducing, Starr remains a spoiled little brat, Jessica is...

My View of Llanview: July 30 Edition

Thursday, July 29, 2010 11:01 PM EDT
Photo: Errol Lewis/SONFriday, July 30, 2010 12:01 AM ET | By Scotty Gore (SoapOperaNetwork.com) — "One Life to Live" continues to wither on the vine by maintaining the status quo. Last week, Natalie and Jessica found out their were each pregnant (both women apparently conceived at the same time no less), foreshadowing two more "Who's the Daddy?" storylines on a soap that recycles more storylines than most people change undergarments. Even worse, the canvas has been flooded with paternity storylines in the past year. Stacy's baby's daddy is Rex...no it's Schuyler...no wait, it's Oliver Fish. Schuyler is Roxy's son. Rex is Mitch's son...no wait, his father is some guy no one's ever heard of, while is mom is an Native American woman who died of a broken heart...again, someone who was unconnected with everyone else. Inez is Ford and James' mother....and Nate's mom as well. Dani is really Todd's daughter, not Ross'. And...

My View of Llanview: July 15 Edition

Wednesday, July 14, 2010 11:01 PM EDT
Photo: Errol Lewis/SONThursday, July 15, 2010 12:01 AM ET | By Scotty Gore (SoapOperaNetwork.com) — The Top 5 reasons "One Life to Live's" ratings are in the toilet. Given the crap that "OLTL" has been dishing out lately in terms of poor writing, bad acting, and choppy storytelling, here are a few of the major reasons why I believe the show is getting what it deserves. 5. Constant re-writes and behind-the-scenes antics. To  anyone who is left watching this show on a regular basis, it is evident that certain scenes and plot twists have surely been revised and rewritten. Take Eli for instance...what possible motive would have for killing Melinda, pushing Marty down the stairs and killing her unborn baby, and severely beating Ford? It would make about as much scene as having Addie, Jack, or Sam do it. And the constant scenes with Eli trying to explain his actions to Hannah and Ford are...

My View of Llanview: June 30 Edition

Tuesday, June 29, 2010 11:01 PM EDT
Photo: Errol Lewis/SONWednesday, June 30, 2010 12:01 AM ET | By Scotty Gore (SoapOperaNetwork.com) — Llanview experiences an infestation of the teenage variety. Summer tends to bring carefree days, refreshing dips in the pool, and golden brown tans. However, it also tends to bring out the worst in daytime dramas, particularly "One Life to Live." It may not even be the 4th of July yet, but Llanivew has been plagued with something far worse than locusts, boll weevils, and mosquitos combined. That's right...a plethora of new one-dimensional cardboard teenage cast members whose characters are unrelated from pretty much any recognizable veteran character currently on the canvas. First it was the Starr X'd Lovers musical back in May which, by the way, was hideous in its own right, but what's happening now makes that look like Emmy Award winning material. It's times like this that I find myself longing for the days when Dena...

My View of Llanview: June 15 Edition

Monday, June 14, 2010 11:01 PM EDT
Photo: Errol Lewis/SONTuesday, June 15, 2010 12:01 AM ET | By Scotty Gore (SoapOperaNetwork.com) — The lazy days of summer are beginning to take their toll. The hot, humid days of summer (or technically late spring, since summer doesn't officially arrive for a few more days) have made Llanview a boring place and me even lazier than usual, if that's possible. So, instead of writing yet another column about how much "One Life to Live" sucks right now, and how it is being overrun with newbies and no-talent hacks, I'm going to step into the time machine 365 days and take a look back at a few excerpts from my column exactly one year ago, just to see how much (or little) the show has changed since that time. So here goes... "My first pet peeve with "OLTL" right now is the unnecessary canning of two-thirds of Llanview's McBain family. Now don't...

My View of Llanview: May 30 Edition

Saturday, May 29, 2010 11:01 PM EDT
Photo: Errol Lewis/SONSunday, May 30, 2010 12:01 AM ET | By Scotty Gore (SoapOperaNetwork.com) — Like Momma always says "If you can't say anything nice, then don't say anything at all." I'm sure some of you are expecting this column to lengthy, in depth, and opinion filled. If so, then I'm sorry but you're mistaken. Two things are preventing me from making this particular edition of the column all of the things mentioned above. The first is a result of time constraints. I have a dozen things going on this holiday weekend, and I just simply don't have the time to set down and compose a rather drawn out column. And second, even if I did, there is very, very little on the show right now that is even worth mentioning. And I would rather not get on my soapbox and rant and rave about how much "One Life to Live" stinks...

My View of Llanview: May 15 Edition

Friday, May 14, 2010 11:01 PM EDT
Photo: Errol Lewis/SONSaturday, May 15, 2010 12:01 AM ET | By Scotty Gore (SoapOperaNetwork.com) — The promo says that "'One Life to Live' finds its voice" with this musical. Well, if that's the case, I hope it gets a prolonged case of laryngitis. With the arrival of "Starr X'd Lovers: The Musical" came a sense of dread for me. Although I do like when the show experiments with new things from time to time, the thought of another prom night musical extravaganza left me with more than a few reservations. Then I heard a familiar tune: "Here's what you do when you don't find the rainbow's end,This time. Here's where you go when it looks like the rain won't end, don't cry. I'll give you tomorrow. Let me be the one you share it with, And each day that follows, 'Cause we only have 'ONE LIFE TO LIVE!'" Granted it wasn't performed by...

My View of Llanview: April 15 Edition

Wednesday, April 14, 2010 11:01 PM EDT
Photo: Errol Lewis/SONWednesday, April 15, 2010 12:01 AM ET | By Scotty Gore (SoapOperaNetwork.com) -- "One Life to Live's" closing credits have really been capturing my attention lately. This edition of "My View of Llanview" is brought to you by TurboTax.  Get your biggest tax refund ever, guaranteed!  Choose easy.  Choose TurboTax.  The #1 tax preparation software preferred by rich people in Llanview and all across the United States.  Sorry for the plug, but I just had to throw it in after watching "OLTL" recently and seeing Natalie promote TurboTax during a conversation with Jessica.  Moving on, the show has become so boring in recent months that little else (outside of the product placement for TurboTax) has been capturing my attention. The 2pm (1pm where I live) hour has become more of a time to fix lunch, finish some housework, or do much anything else to kill time while watching "OLTL." I don't even mind...

My View of Llanview: March 30 Edition

Monday, March 29, 2010 11:01 PM EDT
Photo: Errol Lewis/SONTuesday, March 30, 2010 12:01 AM ET | By Scotty Gore (SoapOperaNetwork.com) -- One controversial life to live. "When trying to please everyone, you ultimately please no one." Truer words were never spoken. After limping on one leg into 2010, things seem to have gone from bad to worse for "One Life to Live." And, while the majority of the criticism has been justified, some of it is simply the result of misinterpretation. Last week, the website IrishCentral.com posted a story in which they villified "OLTL's" recent St. Patrick's Day tribute as "the most disgraceful depiction ever seen." The site takes particular offense to Llanview's resident drunk, Roxy Balsom, who was dressed in green from head to toe in honor of the holiday, and offering free beer to patrons of her hair salon, Foxy Roxy's. Now, in and of itself, that does sound bad. When placed in the proper context,...